Untitled 5
We all have that mental image of the ideal mate. We want them to be good looking, to be smart, to meet us on the same mental and emotional level. But then we also know that life is cruel, that we desire things we can never get. As much as people don’t like to admit it, people’s standards change according to what is available to them.
In the span of time before a person gets into a relationship, their friends ask them what they think of the person they’re currently in love with. “So, do you really love him/her? How good is he/she for you?” Questions like this one aren’t answered with “We’re perfect for one another,” only idiots say that. The most common answer is, “Well, he/she is okay, but…”
The thing is, there’s always that conjunction “but” that answers the question with “okay.” It’s not bad and it’s not perfect, either. It’s in the gray area. Which leads me to my question: is falling in love with someone an act of compromise?
Of course, not everyone would admit to actually doing this. But think about it: the moment we start liking someone, our ideal person temporarily steps out of our mind. We’re so caught up in the person we’re in love with that we don’t realize how different he/she is from the one that we desire most. So I guess we do compromise, only subconsciously.
Then there’s something else – not only do we shift our standards for the ideal mate, but we also (somehow) compromise ourselves. Admit it, we try to change ourselves so that the other person would like us more. There’s this certain aggressiveness that appears whenever we try to “snag” the person we like. We try to look better and we flirt with them… like talking to them more often than we do other people. I don’t know if this falls into the area of compromise, but hey, if we all acted like that towards other people we don’t like (or even our friend-friends), shouldn’t everyone be getting along by now?
In the span of time before a person gets into a relationship, their friends ask them what they think of the person they’re currently in love with. “So, do you really love him/her? How good is he/she for you?” Questions like this one aren’t answered with “We’re perfect for one another,” only idiots say that. The most common answer is, “Well, he/she is okay, but…”
The thing is, there’s always that conjunction “but” that answers the question with “okay.” It’s not bad and it’s not perfect, either. It’s in the gray area. Which leads me to my question: is falling in love with someone an act of compromise?
Of course, not everyone would admit to actually doing this. But think about it: the moment we start liking someone, our ideal person temporarily steps out of our mind. We’re so caught up in the person we’re in love with that we don’t realize how different he/she is from the one that we desire most. So I guess we do compromise, only subconsciously.
Then there’s something else – not only do we shift our standards for the ideal mate, but we also (somehow) compromise ourselves. Admit it, we try to change ourselves so that the other person would like us more. There’s this certain aggressiveness that appears whenever we try to “snag” the person we like. We try to look better and we flirt with them… like talking to them more often than we do other people. I don’t know if this falls into the area of compromise, but hey, if we all acted like that towards other people we don’t like (or even our friend-friends), shouldn’t everyone be getting along by now?
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I dunno. What do you think? I’m mentally incapacitated to end this properly now… the shower I just took cooled down all my brain cells. Sorry.
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I'm back. Not as an active blogger as before (and probably not much of that thinker anymore either), but just.... back. I have this new not-entirely-negative-and-not-entirely-positive emotional thing going on, so I will try to write when I can.
posted by roseraven11 @ 6:49 AM
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